Of Children’s Parties and Hockey Pucks

A Nuclear Nerds Trait Origin Story

“Thielman, get in there ya bastard!”

The coach signaled the whole team toward the blue line, each with a puck resting at the blade, and the coach blew the whistle. All at once, the whole team fired pucks toward Aiden Thielman, and they struck in a series of dull thuds, like that of roadkill being bludgeoned by a sociopath. They careened off Aiden Thielman’s legs and chest and arms and then fell harmlessly to the ice, where he looked at them with disdain and contempt. Then a final puck drilled him in the facemask. This was Aiden’s life: backup goalie on the Waukee Admirals.

When he took up a second gig, that of running an illegal children’s party mascot business while leveraging the Milwaukee Admiral’s branding, the team came down hard on him. He got tossed in the clinker, which is exactly where it happened. As the nuclear holocaust began, something broke like a stick slashed across his brain.

The Asskicking Admiral went from the target of pucks and litigation to targeting every innocent nerd he could find.

The above is an expanded veresion of my entry into the contest for this nft. Congrats to Dirt Hippy, who took home the prize for this one and now owns the Admiral pictured with the below 280 character entry:

Like most school bullies, Melvin found himself working a menial job after graduation — Long John Silvers. Classmates thought it funny to nickname him “Admiral”. When the bombs hit, Mel realized the world NEEDED bullying. So when his crew made a home of a beached battleship, OF COURSE he had to take the admiral’s hat.